Poker is a game that I love very much but unfortunately poker has a dark side.
When you have dedicated as many hours to this game as I have you’ve seen your fair share of the evil that poker can bring out of people.
Before I dive into some of my experiences it’s important for me to say that I don’t think that poker in of itself is evil. Poker is nothing more than a card game. It is people who decide to behave in certain ways which ends up tarnishing a beautiful game.
This is the first post in a number of posts I plan to write which will tell some of the darker stories from my experiences playing this game over the last 8 years.
The Pocket Aces Impossibility
I remember the scene like it was yesterday. I was just off the main street in a little town in Israel called Raanana, when I got a call from a long time poker buddy of mine. He spent the next few minutes telling me about the previous night’s poker session. The funny was that his description of the session was almost identical to a few other sessions which had taken place in the last few months. There was a pattern.
My friend described for the 4th or 5th time how one of the players in the game had picked up aces over six times in the session. My friend can exaggerate with the best of them but I knew he wasn’t exaggerating this time round. The reason I believed him was because I had seen this seemingly statistical anomaly with my own eyes. This player, lets call him X seemed to have a special gift in being dealt pocket aces.
An interesting question that needs to be answered before I continue is what is the likelihood of picking up aces in your standard 9-handed poker game? I mean we have all been in sessions when we get dealt aces a few times in the session right? The odds of being dealt pocket aces is 1 in 220 hands. Now in a regular home game you are expected to be dealt around 25 – 35 hands an hour, depending on the game and the overall ability of the players in the game to deal a hand of Texas Holdem. It also depends if there is a dedicated dealer or not. Most of the time there isn’t a dealer so the average number of hands lands up being around 30 an hour.
This means that in a typical session you should be dealt aces less than once. Since there is variance in hand distribution stats you will sometimes go a few sessions without picking up aces. Every now and then you will get dealt aces three or more times in a single sitting, this is just how the math works.
Now imagine you are aware of the fact that a random player should get dealt aces once a session and instead he is getting dealt aces three to six times every single time you sit with him. This should set off some alarms, and when it came to player X the alarms had been ringing for a while.
It was a cold Thursday night when we finally caught player X in the act. It wasn’t me who noticed it, it was a younger player who caught him dealing himself an ace. The black ace of spades.
Over the next 24 hours information started spreading that player X had been dealing himself an ace every so often , thus dramatically increasing his chances of picking up pocket aces. He had been doing this for months and had made a lot of money doing it. He had made some money off of me as well but financially the biggest damage was caused by him fleecing the weaker players in the game over the previous months. When the fish are stripped of their money by a single (cheating) player, the win rate of the other winners in the game drops significantly. Player X had cost me thousands of dollars in potential profit over a 6 – 12 month period.
Player X was ashamed of his actions and tried to apologize to us. Some forgave him and even started playing with him again. I decided that if this guy could do this to his so-called friends for that long he didn’t deserve forgiveness. Perhaps that makes me seem cold… or perhaps that is just the dark side of poker.
The magically growing stack of chips
Every now and then a new player will show up in your regular game who just rubs you the wrong way. Player Y was irritating and a horrible player (these characteristics usually go together). He would play with us once maybe twice a week and usually drop a few hundred dollars before leaving the game.
In one particular session Player Y ended up cashing out almost one and a half thousand dollars, a significant profit. I was surprised when I heard that he had so much in front of him because I didn’t remember him playing particularly well, and couldn’t remember him winning any huge pots. Another problem was that when we cashed everyone out we were hundreds of dollars short. The minute I heard that we were short I knew that somehow Player Y had brought chips into the game.
Let me take a step back and walk you through this slowly.
In the cash game sessions I play in there is always a dedicated “banker” who handles the money and chips. Usually everyone will buy in for say a hundred or two hundred dollars and get a stack of chips. The money is all given to the “banker” who puts it in the chip case or his pocket. The “banker” is responsible for making sure that at the end of the game when everyone hands back their chips that there is enough money to cash everyone out.
In this fateful evening when the game had come to an end and we counted the value of the chips we saw that the value of the chips in play was much higher than the value of the money given to the “banker”. The only way this can happen is if the “banker” made one or more mistakes, or additional chips were brought into the game. Since the difference was not ten bucks but hundreds of dollars it was obvious that chips had been smuggled into the game.
After a lot of shouting, threats and other noise I took the money owed to me and left the apartment. I was concerned that the neighbors would call the cops and I didn’t want to be around for that.
In the end the story goes as follows. In a session earlier that week Player Y brought his cell phone charger with him to the game. After the game he left and “forgot” his charger. Some time after the game he phoned up the host and came back to the apartment to get his charger. The host let him in and apparently it was at this time that Player Y snatched some chips from the case with the intention to smuggle them into the game in the next session.
Player Y never played with us again.
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Thanks and good luck at the tables.